Thank you for considering Parentfinder to help with your adoption journey. To get started, please click on the button below that best describes you.
Hello! Thank you so much for taking the time to learn more about us!
Our names are Sheila and Alexander (or Xandy). We are a couple in our mid-thirties living just outside of Denver, in Arvada Colorado. Sheila is a fourth-generation Coloradan who grew up in Buena Vista, while Xandy grew up in Northern California just north of San Francisco. We first met in college at the University of Colorado at Boulder (go Buffs!) and we quickly started dating seriously and have been joined at the hip ever since.
We have been together now since 2006 and married since 2011. Throughout those years we have been blessed to work together, travel with family, and to live in Seattle, Atlanta, and the mountains. We are now happily settled in our home here along the Front Range and can’t wait to start a family.
We have always talked about adopting (Sheila’s lifelong friend Amy is adopted) and after dealing with infertility we knew that God wanted us to walk the adoption path. We know the right child and birth mother is out there somewhere waiting for us. Maybe that’s the both of you!
We hope this book can help you learn about what makes us special and the life we have built with our family and friends.
Expectant mothers who choose to make an adoption plan may qualify for some level of financial assistance during their pregnancy. However, each person's situation and specific needs are different. Your adoption social worker can help you determine what level of assistance you qualify for and deserve. Many expectant mothers qualify for financial assistance to cover basic pregnancy and living expenses, including but not limited to - transportation reimbursement, utility assistance for phone, water, and electricity/gas, maternity clothing and supplements, etc.
Navigating a pregnancy alone is never easy. Depending on your situation and location, you may qualify for financial assistance to help cover the cost of basic living expenses, such as food and groceries.
Receiving quality medical care during your pregnancy is vital to both your health and the health of your baby. If you choose to place your baby for adoption, all of your pregnancy-related medical expenses will be covered by the adoptive family.
Women who choose to place their baby for adoption may receive financial assistance to help cover the cost of rent and utilities. If you feel that you’ll need some help with these costs, it’s important to talk to your adoption social worker about it early in the process. Each expectant mother’s situation is different, and eligibility may vary.
In order to have a healthy pregnancy, it’s important that you have everything you need to lead a healthy lifestyle. Like food and groceries, the cost of some household items - like feminine and dental care items, along with prenatal supplements - may be covered during your pregnancy.
Placing a baby for adoption is a loving, but incredibly challenging decision to make. Many women experience an array of emotions during this time and find that counseling is very helpful in navigating those feelings. If you would like to receive counseling during or after your pregnancy, that can be arranged by your adoption social worker. The cost of counseling will be covered by the adoptive family or adoption organization.
If you need assistance with transportation, your adoption social worker can work with you to find the best solution. You may eligible for assistance with transportation costs or be connected with a transportation service to utilize during your pregnancy.
It won't cost you anything. If you choose to place your baby for adoption, all of your medical and legal fees will be covered and you may be eligible for financial assistance with other pregnancy-related expenses.
Yes. Even if you don’t know the identity of the birth father, you can still choose to make an adoption plan. However, every adoption situation is different. The adoption social worker you’re assigned to will get to know you and your story first, and then guide you through the process accordingly.
You can make an adoption plan at any point in your pregnancy, even after the baby has been born. But, it's important to start the process as early in your pregnancy as possible. Connecting with those resources will allow you to gain access to important medical services, including prenatal care, to help ensure a healthy pregnancy.
One aspect of your adoption plan is the "Hospital Plan" an outline of how you'd like your hospital stay and delivery to go. You can craft this on your own or with the help of your adoption social worker. But everything is up to you. You’ll be able to choose who comes to the hospital with you, who is in the room with you during delivery, and how much time you’d like to spend with the baby before signing the final papers.
As part of your adoption plan, you'll determine whether or not you’d like to have an open or closed adoption or something in between. Open adoptions may include phone calls, messaging (via social media, email, or text), and/or periodic visits each year. Closed adoptions may include no contact at all or annual updates provided to the birth parent(s) by the adoptive family. Each post-adoption relationship is different and can vary based on what an expectant mother chooses in her adoption plan.
We were lucky enough to have family in town to visit us and celebrate our Godson Finn's 5th Birthday. We spent the whole day doing his favorite things and hanging out with his family while exploring Colorado. We took him and his brother fishing (Xandy tought them both how to catch their first trout!), played in backyard, enjoyed delicious cake, and had a great day hanging with all of our family. It was a great day to say the least and we are so lucky to have him in our lives.
We spent a fun filled four days in San Fransisco and Santa Rosa, CA seeing family and friends and wishing Xandy's sister Bailey a bon voyage as she graduated high school! We spent the first few days visiting two of our closest friends Sean and Jess, and Tessa and Kiron; both couples who had just had their first. It was fun to hang out with both of the adorable bundles of joy, and spend timing catching up with our first time parent friends. Sean and Jess were even kind enough to ask us to be godparents to their son, we couldn't be happier to have a special part in his life! We also were able to explore San Fransisco and even rented bikes to bike across the Golden Gate Bridge. It was Xandy's first time on the bridge (outside of a car!) even though he lived in the area for 18 years. He was glad he finally knocked it off the list, and we had a great time taking in the views. The rest of the trip was spent hanging out with Xandy's family, celebrating Bailey's graduation from high school as well as his Dad's birthday. We were able...
We just celebrated our 10th Anniversary last month and took an adventureous trip to Belize in Central America! We did some of our favorite things including relaxing on the beach, snorkling with sting rays and nurse sharks, fly fishing, and exploring Belize's natural wonders. Xandy loved seeing the Mayan ruins (his grandfather is from Central America) and Sheila absolutely loved the cave tour we took, going almost a mile into deep caves once used by the Mayans for religious purposes and wading across two rivers to get there! It was a great trip and such an adventure, we just can't wait to celebrate big family occasions with our daughter or son!
We were lucky enough to get the vaccine in March, which was such a blessing. We were so happy to be able to see our parents safely, a few of our friends, and hopefully it will also be easier to meet you (our future birth mom) in person as well! In order to give back and say thanks Sheila was able to start volunteering at some vaccination sites a few times a month, helping people go through the process of getting vaccinated themselves and doing our best to help our community. Sheila has always been a big believer in giving back, working for a non-profit through college and we hope to teach our little one how good it feels when you help and do your part for our community. We can't wait to meet the both of you!
Xandy just had his birthday in March and since we were able to get our vaccine's Sheila planned a trip to Hawaii!!! This was the first time we had ever been and we absolutely loved it! We both love to travel and usually take a trip or two every year to somewhere new. With the beaches, waterfalls, snorkeling, and tons of other activities it got us really excited to take trips as a whole family in the future. We saw tons of kids playing with their parents and we can't wait to do the same, showing them new places, new exciting things, and how beautiful our world is.
We spent a beautiful Easter, with one of Sheila's best friends Amy, her Husband Dave, and their new little girl Ava. Sheila and Amy have been friends from the time they were six, growing up together and staying best friends for almost thirty years! Amy was adopted and has been extremely supportive of us during our whole adoption journey and can't wait to meet our future little one. Amy gave us an adorable book, "God found us You" and we were able to spend some time with her daughter Ava, who is simply precious and so full of joy and laughter. We know Ava and our little one will become best friends too!
We both love traveling and food and when we found out it was national Pizza day this past Tuesday we decided it was time to try our hand at making pizza from scratch. So with Google, and a few cook books at our disposal we tried our hand at some homemade pizza! We both love to do fun activities and after sucessfully making some delicious pizza thought that this would be such a fun thing to do with our daughter or son down the road! We can't wait to do fun activities like this with a little one.
Merry Christmas! We had a fun adventure this year, cutting down our Christmas tree outside of Grandby. It was a beautiful day filled with fresh snow, hot chocolate, and a great Christmas tree. Sheila was able to spot the perfect tree and Xandy was able chop it down quickly and get it home safely on our Jeep! It will be so much fun to do this with our future little one. We can't wait to see what tree they pick out and to share the joy of decorating the tree together as a family. For Christmas we went and visited Sheila's family in Alamosa. Everyone was able to get tested ahead of time so we were able to do a bunch of fun activities safely, including teaching our family how to make pasta from scratch, opening presents (our Niece Olivia is a big Santa Clause fan!), and even taking some family photos together. Everyone is so excited for us to adopt and can't wait to meet the newest member of our family. They will be instantly loved and will become part of a loving family.
We had a wonderful Thanksgiving this year spending time with Xandy's family as well as picking up some great vintage records from Sheila's Aunt. Sheila's Aunt Mary Anne had just retired after years of working at the Colorado Education Deparment, and gave us a giant selection of her old records. We both love music, and felt like we really scored with some Queen, Bruce Springsteen, and even Thriller from Michael Jackson! We can't wait to share our love of music with our child, and think these classics will be a blast to listen to with them or play to them when they are little. We celebrated Thanksgiving at Xandy's mom Laurie's house this year on her back patio. We were joined by his younger cousin Page and her boyfriend for a delicious Thanksgiving meal. Paige even made Xandy's family's traditional 'harper' house rolls. A recipe we can't wait to share with our little one.
We had a fun weekend fishing and hanging out with Sheila's cousin Brandi. Brandi and her husband Josh are avid fisherman and we spent the weekend fishing, cooking and playing with our favorite toddler Ives, their 3-year old son. It was great to see them as we used to hang out quite a bit before they moved to the moutains last year. Sheila was especially excited to hang out with Ives, play trucks, and spend the day finding bugs on the river. The weekend was super relaxing and we were able to catch big fish, explore the area, and enjoy some time outside!
Our first blog post, hurray! We recently got back from seeing Xandy's Dad, Sister, and Stepmom for a week in Yellowstone National Park. It was so good for all of us to get away and enjoy the great outdoors together, as well as just spend some family time catching up. Xandy's family drove all the way from California, and it was his little sister Bailey's first time in the park. We got super lucky as we were able to see a ton of animals (Xandy even made a family 'bingo' card for it!). We saw buffalo, elk, bald eagles, pronghorns, bears, and even a moose family came and said hello to us at the cabin. Luckily we always kept a safe distance :). The trip made us really excited for how great it will be to take a little one with us and see all the animals, waterfalls, and geysers. We can't wait to share adventures like this with them!
The below form is not a contract or promise of financial assistance. It is merely used to articulate your past due debts and monthly expenses and income.